I’ve Wearied Myself
I’m an expert at complicating things. I like to have plans, you see. And plans are better, aren’t they, with a contingency plan or two or six?
Well of course. If it’s worth planning, it’s worth planning well, no?
If it’s worth doing, it’s worth my best, right?
Um, wrong.
There are plenty of things, sure, that are worth my best efforts. Gift-choosing comes to mind. So does listening.
But some tasks just do not benefit from greater effort or more planning.
Say, for example, taking out the trash. If the recyclables have been set aside, and the garbage relocated from the kitchen trash can to the curbside barrel, no amount of planning can improve on that task.
Brushing my teeth is another example. So long as I have thoroughly brushed with a decent toothpaste and rinsed thoroughly, I can’t add value.
If I really think about it, plenty of things are simple that way. Driving to work? All that’s really required is that I don’t run out of gas or hit anybody.
Last week I talked about letting go, of trying different ways of being, of doing. This week, I’ve chosen a place to begin.
I’m working to step back from overthinking everything.
When I stop and think about it, not much is under my control. And no amount of planning will change that.
Some things are best just enjoyed as they come along, without any effort to turn them into something grander than they are.
Like chocolate chip cookies. Sure, they’re awesome made into an ice cream sandwich. And yes, they’re killer warm from the oven.
But as my sweet granddaughter Daphne demonstrates, a plain-old-cold chocolate chip cookies is still a quite delightful thing.
Maybe it’s time for me to be still, and have a cookie.
23 The steps of a man are established by the Lord,
And He delights in his way.
24 When he falls, he will not be hurled headlong,
Because the Lord is the One who holds his hand.
25 I have been young and now I am old,
Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken
Or his descendants begging bread.
26 All day long he is gracious and lends,
And his descendants are a blessing.Psalm 37:23-26 (NASB)
I can so relate to this, Sheila, so step aside. *I* was the Queen of Over-planning. I can’t be sure, but I think I earned that crown during the years I was a nurse – especially when I was in administration. Planning was essential to completing necessary tasks on time, and timing was critical. I was in my 30’s before I had children, and they completely demolished my efforts to plan and control. I’m not sure when God broke me, but it was when I realized that I was wasting so much time and effort that I began to hold onto that passage of scripture above – asking God to order my steps and free me from that need to control all the events in my life.
I’m honored to be a member of your court, Patricia!